Q & A

On my last post I got a question from Oatmeal Girl over at Submission and Metaphor. It's something that I often roll around in my head so I thought rather than just reply in a comment I would make an entry out of it. So here's the question I received:

a question, though - which is a question for me, too - having tasted a D/s relationship and found it immensely fulfilling on a psychological level, i at least worry about embarking on another relationship (should that even be possible) that doesn't include that dynamic. when you explore the idea of meeting new people, do you have that in mind?

This is something I have thought about a lot, especially as I have started the slow process of meeting new people and getting out there again. Because generally, being submissive, and needing that sort of D/s dynamic in my relationship isn't something I know how to bring up casually in a conversation. Maybe someone could give me pointers on that, actually.

But I don't think it's something that most people know how to bring up casually. Especially in that time when things are new and exciting and fragile, how do you bring up something that some people might find repulsive, something they might turn their noses up at you for, or something that just isn't their kink.

So far I've only been out with people I've made aware of my predilections before we've gone out. Because I don't see the point in starting something with out that being out in the open before hand, because it's something so vital to who I am. I don't think I'd be capable of having a plain vanilla relationship anymore.

Irch used to say, he had ruined me for other men - I'm not completely certain about that just yet, but I do know that he has ruined me for any other type of relationship.

Of course, I'm the meeting people over the internet type, so my method doesn't work so well for meeting people face to face, like most normal people do I'm sure. I think the internet is a really handy tool for making sure you can get the important things out in the open before meeting someone, just to know if there is even a possibility for a connection.

So this is where I've been on this whole front, we'll see what happens later though, but so far it's had interesting results.